There are many of us right now, who are discovering the myths behind what we thought were our truths. This year is all about that, so it’s fitting, and if you are one of them, you’re on track. Something that needs to be addressed in the process of self-discovery is self-love.
Like many others, I have had my own struggles with understanding what the difference is between being loving and kind to myself, versus being selfish. I’ve also struggled with that calling to be of service, while trying to understand how that translated into self-care. Spirit has shown me through my own experiences, that there is a need for clarity in this area.
I am brought to a time when I was so down in the dumps I couldn’t see my way out. Others came to me for help, and the tiny bit of strength I could muster was given freely, as my calling to help others is so deep. As is the case with many of us, I found that my great love for helping others did not seem to be reciprocated. In my humanness, I thought about what that might mean. Was I not giving enough, even still? Was I not worthy of receiving? Is this from a past life or am I paying some kind of Karmic debt? It’s normal to look for reasons when something is not working the way we anticipated it would work.
In that space, I was asked to think about what it was I was giving the people who needed my help. Was I being fully present with them? Perhaps not. How could I, when I was in such a state of discomfort, depletion and hopelessness? Was I giving them a clear picture of what was possible? Maybe, but not from my own example. It’s tough to see much from that deep place of processing grief, shame, or the other emotions that are considered ‘negative.’
So the lessons is this- self-care, self-love, and self-development are key to being whole and healthy. We can’t wait for someone to pick us up and dust us off. We must find that within ourselves. You may be asking, “If I have nothing left to give, what can I possibly give even myself?” That’s where the truth comes in. We are not just these physical beings. We carry a seed of the Light of God in all of us. That seed is the door to our strength. The strength within you is the Light within you. You may not realize it, but it’s that place of Light inside of you that you are calling in when you help others, and it’s that same place that will help you to help yourself as well.
You’re not just your body, and your body/brain, is not the source of all things. Use them as tools and resources, by all means, but do not mistake that they are your only source! Your connection to the Light of God, is what makes you who you are. It’s not your education, style of fashion, choice of automobile or your job. Those are all things that are physical, but they do not define the whole of who we are. At the end of the day, you can lose all of those things- even your physical body, and you will still have your Light.
You are entitled to the full spectrum of the Love and care you offer others, and it is available to you, always. Call upon it when you need it. The supply is Limitless.
Manifestation is a hot topic, and there are plenty of ‘experts’ that will tell you, or rather ‘sell’ you, how it all works. Just like you, I, too, have had my eyes and ears open to the maelstrom of information that exists on the topic. And like most things, I’ve found that when it comes to how to accomplish something, there’s only one way that works for me- my way.
No, I’m not ego-tripping on you! When I’m helping others, I often try to use story as a method to illustrate this very point. I’ve been through workshops, readings, training and certification on various techniques on how to do one thing or another. The exercise wasn’t really to find ‘the way,’ but to observe and uncover the hidden truths in the applications of techniques and methods- resulting in what I call, ‘my way.’ In the end, the truth that always rings the loudest-
To thine own self, be true.
Now be careful with your definitions. Words don’t always mean what you say with your lips. Before there are words, there are ideas. In order to communicate them, we use the words available to us to explain. Sometimes it doesn’t always translate, as is the case when people use a phrase such as this. It can easily be taken as a self-important, pompous way of being. But consider this- that is only the case when we separate ourselves from all that is, as if we are not connected, not a part of all that is. Read that last sentence aloud, and then see if you find a difference in where you are coming from when you now repeat the phrase, ‘to thine own self, be true.’
2016 is the collective reawakening of humanity to the idea that there is strength within communion that is not attainable through separation. What I mean is this- in comtemporary society, it’s acceptable to think in terms of Darwinsm, even if you don’t necessarily subscribe to that teaching. We are tiny machines, competing for resources and only those who separate themselves from the pack and rise above it are successful. This mindset is responsible for every act of violence taken in everyday life. The fear behind the thoughts that we must be stronger than the next person, and eliminate competition for resources in order to survive and thrive, creates a system of subsequent values that move us even further in the direction of separation. The result? War on a multitude of levels, including war within our own selves. It is true that change is not easy or comfortable, but I believe we are coming into an age of awareness that will allow us to adopt the concept that we are all connected, and that everything you do affects others, and everything others do, affects you. In this model, all of us have a stake in doing the right thing because it makes a better world for all of us- thy self, included. So celebrate the accomplishments of others. Be in awe and appreciation of the things your fellow brothers and sisters have and are- because they are yours as well, by virtue of our connection to all there is and to one another.
So what does this have to do with manifestation? Well, if you are willing to become aware of your connection to all there is, then you can’t help but notice that you have access to all there is. And if you know that we are all connected, you also can’t help but notice that means you are in communication with all there is. This is an important shift. As you awaken to this sense of connection, you are also becoming aware of the aspects of your self.
You = Thought/Mind + Emotion/Heart + Intuition/Spirit.
Each aspect of our ‘self,’ has a role and function. Manifestation does not come from thoughts alone. Big news flash- Thoughts do not program your entire being. They are not responsible for the whole of you! Thoughts attempt to explain and decipher, and that is where you are lead down the primrose path of confusion. The way to the Truth, is to become aware of the other aspects of yourself that a you are discounting, and allow them to be a part of the conversation. The Heart is the bridge that connects Thought and Spirit through Emotion. Once you begin to see this as the true ‘Trinity,’ within, you will begin to understand what real wholeness is about, and for the first time, perhaps, alignment is possible!
So, my dear readers, the key to manifestation is awakening to our whole, recognizing your connection to all living things, in being in communion with all there is. Once you come from this place, and not a place of fear, separation, and hierarchy, the universe conspires to bring you what you seek, and you begin to see synchronicities and omens that validate the process.
It would be so much easier to sell you a package for $199 that will give you the steps to manifestation, and then continue to sell you the sequel and so on, but my purpose here is not to keep you attached to me, it is to set you free!
Wishing all of you a Blessed 2016! Happy New Year!
Sometimes the darkness can show you the light!
If you read my blog on how to move past your blocks and into your future, and have started the process, then this is a good time for you to move on to the next phase.
Simply gazing up at the beautiful Christmas moon, shows you the power of the Darkness, as the Light of that beautiful heavenly body pierced the night sky. So too, can your darkness show you, your powerful Light within.
The Shadow Self, a term coined by Carl Jung is the part of us that we keep hidden from the world, and oftentimes, from ourselves. This is not necessarily a conscious decision, however, taking steps to explore it and what it holds is a conscious choice. After you have been journaling for some time, you will begin to notice things that didn’t pop up into your awareness before. These are your personal Shadows, and they can help you move forward if you allow yourself to look at them without judgement. For example, you may have been writing about your career, or lack of one. Perhaps you will find that there are words or phrases you use frequently in your journaling about this topic. Look carefully. Pretend you are looking into the heart of another person, who is allowing you to peer into the window of their soul, revealing their darkest secrets. Are you seeing patterns that suggest you feel undeserving of a successful career? Do you detect an undertone that implies that people who seek to have an abundance of money are immoral? These concepts may sound silly on the surface, but when we take the time to dig deep, there are patterns and beliefs, operating underneath the surface that are the origin of our blocks.
In order to move past these blocks, you must first acknowledge them. Let yourself sit in the vibration of the thought pattern you’ve uncovered. You can do this actively, thinking about it as you clean up around the house, or take a walk, or you can be still and meditate on it. Either is fine, as long as it feels good to you. Ask yourself if there may have been a specific instance or age when you first came to believe this to be true. Go with the first thing that comes to you, and try not to second-guess. The answers are not right or wrong in this process, and it is quite personal, so be compassionate with yourself as you move through it. You may find something as simple as an incident from your childhood where you saw someone who had a lot of money using it to do evil things, for example. You may have overheard a conversation at a young age around what is a good career choice or a bad one. One simple thought can implant itself in your energy field and act like a virus, hijacking your dreams and personal fulfillment.
Once you have this information, your next step is to ask it to be released. Intuitively, most people have a gut feeling of a ‘yes’ or ‘no,’ but you may also use a pendulum, muscle testing, or other form of accessing your subconscious that feels appropriate.
If you sense there is a ‘no’ or ‘stop’ energy around it when you ask if it is okay to clear the pattern, let it be. There may be a number of reasons for this, such as a lesson your soul is trying to learn, or that you may not be ready to let it go. This doesn’t excuse you from giving it the attention it needs to move past it. It simply means there is more for you to ask your Shadow about. Continue to journal about what you have uncovered and repeat the process of reviewing your writing after a period of time, and ask again, if it is appropriate to remove it from your energy field.
If you sense an intuitive ‘yes’ or ‘go,’ then you may use the method of your choosing to relase the energy of the belief or pattern from your energy field. Since we all have our own ways of intuitively sensing information, I will not prescribe one single way to clear your pattern, as one way does not work for everyone. Some people find that visualizing themselves surrounded by pure Source Energy works well. Others find that it’s helpful to feel or sense where the pattern exists in their aura and use their hands pull it into a bubble of light they send straight to God. Doreen Virtue has a clearing meditation which may be helpful if you feel you need a bit of guidance in your process. However you feel is best for you, is the right way.
If you’ve successfully removed the pattern, you will feel a shift, or difference in your energy field of some kind. It may be subtle or it may be big and booming. Let it be what it is without judging it. If you do not feel that it has been removed, you may try another technique, or you may try going back to your Shadow to ask for more information about the problem you are trying to clear.
As we look forward to 2016, creating our New Year’s Resolutions, it’s also important to also peer into our Shadow and see what is hiding there. You wouldn’t fill a filthy house with new furniture before you cleaned it out, would you? So it’s time to clean house to make room for the all the new, wonderful experiences ahead of you!
Today I need to share something very urgent with all of you. This is a message about the Truth in your tears, and the preciousness inside of you that we call emotions.
Most people find themselves unhappy, seeking out things in the physical world to give them this feeling of joy. At some point, we realize we’ve reached a point where we’ve got to start looking elsewhere. Material things didn’t do it. Money didn’t quite make the mark either. Working out and sculpting our body maybe fell short as well.
I’m here to tell you, that you have come to this place because you are a seeker of Light, not happiness.
You see, much of the ‘self-help’ movement has focused on how we can manipulate our minds and trick ourselves into feeling better. If that truly were the answer, there wouldn’t need to be any more books, speeches or gurus to get us there…. and yet, there are, and here we are.
Feelings, my dear readers, are a precious gift. They are a way of experiencing the world in a body. Yes, we have our 5 senses, but we also have our emotions, which are discounted and treated as inconvenience. Yet, we continue to seek. We continue to find that one holy grail emotion, happiness, through artificial means. Let me ask this question. Do you really even know what happiness means? Is happiness falling in love? Is it being greeted by a puppy who is excited to see you? Is it the feeling secure in the arms of a loved one, or the face of a child who trusts us to care for them?
We are coming at this from the wrong angle. Some of you may have answered ‘yes’ to the aforementioned scenarios. But heres the thing- they are just scenarios. How you feel about them, and what you feel about them is not the scenario, itself, but the internal process of experiencing the scenario.
Feelings are not to be ignored, manipulated or confused into being other feelings. They are messengers. They provide insight into your current state of experiencing the world. They allow you to experience things from your heart space, which is nothing to scoff at. We’re tricked into this way of thinking about ourselves as these little machines, run by our brain and powered by thoughts alone. We are not. We have emotions because they are an integral part of our experience.
Emotions are the bridge between the Soul and the Body. That is why the lower or more ‘physical’ chakras and the higher or more ‘spiritual’ chakras meet in the middle, at the Heart Chakra.
My title speaks of one particular kind of emotion- the kind that illicit those beautiful little badges of salty courage, and love that spill from our eyes, sometimes without our permission. These are the emotions of grief, sadness, shame, lonliness, pain, regret, and fear. This is only a small sampling of what kinds of feelings may bring you to tears, but for the purposes of this blog post, they will suffice. Tears are not acceptable in Western society. We are taught that from an early age. Tears mean you are weak. Tears mean you have CHOSEN to be a victim. Tears mean you are shameful. Tears mean you cannot control yourself. Lastly, tears mean there is something very wrong.
Tears, can be many things. I will list a few examples here.
– Letting go
– Strength or endurance
– An outpouring of Love or Joy that we cannot contain but must allow to flow through us
One thing tears are not. Tears are never ‘wrong.’
Your thoughts and emotions are not separate. They are different. I like to describe thoughts as the way we process situations from the collective information we hold in our brains, and emotion as the way we experience a situation with our Hearts. You cannot think yourself out of a feeling, and you cannot feel yourself out of your thinking (although sometimes it feels that way). They both have something to say, to contribute to the conversation that is your experience of the world.
Please, honor your feelings, especially your tears. They need not be public, but they should always be listened to. The next time you experience an emotion that brings you to tears, allow them to happen, and then speak to them. Ask them what message they have for you. Connect them to your thoughts, but never mistake them as thoughts. Your emotions and thoughts are holding hands, and exist to assist you on your journey here. Respect them both, and your world will transform.
There are so many different approaches and systems that are in the self-help genre, it can be difficult to choose which one is right for you. For many of the people I’ve worked with, a sense of failure quickly follows when whatever the newest trend in self-help, and self-healing didn’t yield the results they were looking for. This has been a sense of frustration for me, personally, over the years as well. Until now.
What I’ve discovered is the first step to any self-help approach has to begin with self-examination. If you had to plan a party, for example, you wouldn’t just go out and buy up whatever you saw in the party store and plop it all down on the counter. There’s a thought process that goes into planning a party, and there’s a thought process that goes into self-healing. After all, you could be setting up for a Bat-Mitzvah, when you wanted to end up with a Graduation party. The process makes a BIG difference in the end result.
Since most of who find ourselves in a pinch try to think ourselves out of it, let’s start with your thinking. Do you even know what you’re really thinking, or what words you use most? This is important, because so many of us are stuck in a pattern that keeps repeating because we are unaware of them. So how do you get aware? You need to start writing things down. Journaling is one of those things that is recommended by almost every guru I’ve ever come across and there’s a good reason for it. It helps you to get out your thoughts without anyone’s judgement, which can be a calming exercise. It also gives you the opportunity to be totally honest, because this journal is not meant for anyone else to read. This is a healing process in and of itself. Being bottled up often leads to destructive behaviors and can lead to illness. Human beings weren’t meant to hold things in, but we don’t necessarily need to share them with other human beings to get them out.
You may be thinking, “Can’t I just go to the gym and work out my frustrations there?” or “I meditate to get calm myself, and I think that’s enough.” Those are valid ways of working out frustrations, and I applaud you for realizing that you are frustrated enough to actually implement a practice. However, like the party-planning, there’s something to be said for the method and the results it yields. You can jog until you’re too exhausted to remember why you were upset to begin with. You can meditate and reach amazing states of altered consciousness, melting away the worries of the world. But here’s what journaling does that other practices does not.
You may think you talked it out in your own mind while you were exercising, or you may feel you got a sense of peace from your spiritual practice, but the pen is mightier than the sword! When you journal, you’re using the written word, which is very powerful, especially if you handwrite, because your energy is pouring out along with those words onto paper. In addition, you are creating a written record of events, and thoughts that you may not be aware of if you simply let those thoughts pass and be on your merry way. At first, your journal may seem like page after page of ranting. That’s okay. We all need to do that sometimes, and it’s the first step to this process! When you’re writing in your journal, no one can see so they cannot judge, but it’s also important for you not to judge yourself either. Don’t think about what is right or wrong to write down. Just think and record. Pretend that you’re in a courtroom and you’re taking down every word that is uttered during a trial. Doesn’t matter which ones are valid in that scenario, does it? What’s important is the record. It doesn’t hav to be a certain length. When you feel you’re finished with your thoughts, you’re finished with your writing. This process requires commitment, but it doesn’t require any set standards or rules to follow.
For those of you who are drawn to this blog and this post in particular, I’d like to ask you to give this a try for a period of 1 week. That’s it. Set aside a time each day where you won’t be interrupted and make sure to write once a day. You can do more than that if you feel guided to, but once a day is usually how most people start.
Stay tuned for Part 2, and please feel free to comment here.
*I am not a licensed mental health professional, and none of what is written intended as medical or psychiatric advice. If you are having a serious issue, please seek the help of a medical or psychiatric health professional.*
Namaste. I see you.
Upon going to bed, have you ever had thoughts about what might be hiding in the dark? Perhaps you even look under the bed. Maybe you can’t sleep unless your closet door is closed. The dark is scary, but why? Logic would tell us that everything should be just the same as it is with the lights on, with the only exception being that we do not have the ability to see it in the absence of light. So why is it that so many of us are afraid of the dark?
The dark is when things are quiet. It’s a time when our other senses are naturally heightened to make up for our lack of visibility. This means that we may hear things that wouldn’t catch our attention during the day when there are a multitude of sounds and distractions around us.
When your senses are heightened, it’s important that you maintain your sense of calm, and there are a couple of reasons for this. First, it’s entirely possible to drive yourself crazy with anxiety and fear, sending adrenaline into your system at the slightest sound. In this case, yes, it is all in your head- and your body chemistry. However, the second reason is that your vibration is like a magnet for anything with a similar vibration. You are like an antenna, sending and receiving signals. And when that signal goes out, it WILL attract!
Yes, I’m going to say it. It is possible for entities to find you and to draw near to you because you are broadcasting, knowingly or unknowingly.
So when you’re laying in bed silently thinking, “Is there anyone there?” someone will most certainly hear you and respond. Although it can happen at any time, during this time of year, the veil between the worlds is very thin, and spirits are much more aware of us, as we are of them. Since like attracts like, keeping your vibration high and your energy field clean is essential to keeping yourself protected and safe.The natural and supernatural world is filled with opposing forces. It is naive to disregard or scuff off the notion that the Dark co-exists with the Light.
This is not to say that you should obsess over it or put your focus there, but if you are going to play in the etheric realms, you must be aware. Just as we put on a seatbelt as a measure of caution when we get in a car, we must also take care to protect ourselves when we connect with Spirit.
So how do you manage this process? Glad you asked!
- Like attracts like, so the easiest way to keep the Boogey Man at bay is to vibrate at a higher vibration. You certainly don’t want lower! The energies that vibrate faster, are the ones that will bring you peace and protection, such as loved ones, guides and angels. How? During your day, monitor your thoughts and feelings. If you find yourself being more positive than negative, catch yourself and try to repeat the thought in a more positive or loving light. For example, if you are at work and a customer snaps at you, you may think, “this person sucks.” Catch yourself and then think a more positive thought such as, “this person is struggling so much he/she could use some kindness and care.” You’ll find that it motivates you in your actions as well as keeping your vibrations high.
- Keep yourself clean! I say this in a playful way, but seriously as well. All day long we are walking through fields of energy. If your energy field isn’t clean and strong, you will be affected much more strongly and often by the energy you encounter during your day. My suggestion is to develop your own script for an evening meditation, asking for Divinity, your angels, Jesus or whomever you feel comfortable asking, to clear any blocks, repair any holes and to strengthen your auric field. Some people like to use the chakras as a way to gage any energetic blocks or issues, which is also a way to clear your energy. Find what feels right for you, and do it!
- Whenever opening up to Spirit, always have a ritual of setting protection and intention. Lots of people simply imagine White Light surrounding our entire being as we are doing our spiritual work. If you like, you can invite your angels or loved ones to lend their energy and protection as you are entering this space.
- Choose a time and place that will be comfortable for you to connect to Spirit. In your bedroom at night probably isn’t the best choice. If you have little privacy, a better choice may be the bathroom! Perhaps the best time for you to connect is during your morning preparation. Spirit hears your thoughts, so you can brush your teeth and talk to Spirit at the same time. Morning may be less frightening than night, and the bathroom or other area is probably less frightening than your bedroom.
- Don’t forget to close the door! When you’ve opened up and invited the Spirit world to join you, it’s vital that you intentionally set some sort of guidelines for ‘closing’ the door when you are through. You wouldn’t send out an invitation for a party without designating a specific time slot, and it’s no different with Spirit. Leave the door open, and you will find very quickly that missing this step will be much like having a party that never ends because your guests don’t know when to go home. They came because you invited them, so give them the courtesy of letting them know when communication is done, and you are closed for business.
As always, I am here to help! If you have a specific question or would like to explore your personal path, you can email me at firstname.lastname@example.org. Personal sessions are confidential and can give you an opportunity to open up with someone who certainly understands where you’re coming from.