Yes You Can

•February 6, 2018 • Leave a Comment

So you want to be a spiritual person, but you feel like you’re just missing something, or can’t quite get it right.  Your mind wanders when you meditate, and no matter how hard you try to bless everyone you meet, you still want to strangle your co-worker who consistently shoots down all of your ideas in front of the boss.

Who’s grading you?

For each of us on our spiritual journey, we first begin our exploration by looking at what’s out there- in other words, ‘which box do I fit in?’  Is it spiritual to disagree with people who seem to be so sure of their beliefs?  Should I keep quiet and politely listen when others direct me on my own path, without solicitation?

**NOTE- before I go any further. There are a number of good people out there who truly care for other people and are doing the best they have with what they were given, both monetarily and from their hearts- Spiritual Teachers included.  This blog does not apply to those people.


So many people in the ‘new age community’ talk about being in the light, and the threefold rule, etc., but in my experience this tends to be a sign of spiritual immaturity, rather than the message that I assume is intended which is- “I’m more evolved than you.”  I’ve found myself wandering in and out of many groups that appeared to be offering me solutions to my existential struggle, or to remedy the dilemma of figuring out my purpose.  In nearly all of them, I found the same thing at the center- a self-serving guru whose only joy in life is being ‘above’ other people.

Be very careful who you open up to in a spiritual setting.  People tend to approach someone for a reading, for example, when they are at a vulnerable point in their lives, or having an emotional struggle.  This is not the time to evaluate a spiritual advisor.  This is no time for someone to make you feel small, nor is it the time for someone to tell you that you are at fault for your terrible circumstances.  Be open when you are happy and free, make the connection then with someone you feel is a kindred spirit.  Then, when you are in trouble, you have someone to call!

For a time, I became a student of Religious Science, as this was something I found interesting and wanted to better understand.  I spent many hours at Sunday Service, and even took the Foundations class that is the beginning step to becoming a practitioner.  There was a lot of ‘God is Good,’ and fluffy pink lights around every person (metaphorically speaking).  It was common to hear someone begin to speak of a problem or issue, only to have their conversation partner interrupt with ‘No! You just tell yourself it’s all working out for the highest good!”  That kind of advice is little help or comfort to someone who is in distress, and processing very valid emotions.  I watched as a very dear friend with severe medical issues, and was desperately trying to stay positive about her plight after suffering through years of treatments, doctors, surgeries, etc., was facing the ‘accusation’ that she had something wrong in her thinking that caused all of this and it was something that needed to be fixed before she would get well.  Is that what passes for compassion?  Oh, but they just want to help!  Yeah, that’s not helping.  Invalidating her suffering- which was and is real- is not loving.  No principle in the world is worth making someone feel that they are at fault when they are already knocked down a black hole.

Darkness is not the opposition of Light.  It is its compliment.  It is part of the whole.  How can you exist as a whole, when you deem half of yourself to be incorrect?

Let me say this clearly:

You, your emotions, your path, your life… is not a mistake.  God/Divinity/Spirit did not need your help to create Universe and does not need your consultation on what you deem to be incorrect.

Can you be spiritual but not fit into any of the current belief systems?

Yes You Can.

Regardless of the many classes, meet ups, groups, etc., I’ve been a part of, I belong to all of them and none of them.  I do not identify with any one classification I’ve encountered.  The only word that comes close to what I am, is Witch, and to many, Witch is a dangerous word.

If you are struggling to find your path, and you’ve found me, know that it is not an accident. There are others like me, but we are hard to find, and tend to find you when you need us.  Drop me a line, or visit me at the Curious Cauldron.  I’m here to serve.

For you GoT fans- Valar Dohaeris


What is Divine Timing?

•August 20, 2017 • Leave a Comment

It began with a familiar smell. It took me a few seconds to place it, but my mind searched quickly through my memories and I found it. The memory replayed of a place and time in my life, over 20 years ago. I found myself walking through that memory, and instead of just seeing it as I saw it at the time it was occurring, I saw it from the perspective of present day, with Spirit present. You might envision this to be a bit like present day Scrooge, going back in time with the ghost of Christmas past. In truth, Spirit walks beside us, illuminating the way, so it’s not all that far-fetched of a concept, is it?

The smell was from a particular college dorm room, and a time in my life when I was even more impatient than I am now. At every age I can remember, I’ve felt like a caged tiger, never quite able to move past a certain radius and constantly feeling that anxious feeling of wanting to be free.

It was a specific moment in time, when an impulse lead to a decision, and that decision caused me to take one course over the infinite others, as all decisions do. With Spirit by my side, I watched my memory play out, and I realized that the mistake I made wasn’t in exercising my free will, but that my mind, with its limited experience and the anxiety of feeling pent up is what drove me to make decisions then. Spirit whispered, ‘Do you see that if you were patient, and waited for the divine timing, you could have avoided this?’

Spirit’s message was like turning on a light in a dark room.

“Your nature is such that you are compelled to act, but do you see that if you wait for the signs from your Higher Self to show you the way and THEN act, things would be different?”

In that moment, the reality of Diving Timing became crystal clear.

The very quiet voice that speaks to us, which feels like it’s coming from behind at times rather than inside, isn’t meant to undermine our ability or free wil to make our own decisions. It allows us to include the part of us with greater perspective that is in tune with the Divine to guide us in making more comprehensive choices.

In a world that is most interested in power and the construct of a hierarchy, there is no room for true inner development, spiritual connection and non-judgemental reflection. Some of us are fortunate enough to find that place of inner knowing, and NOT have it stamped out by the doubt of others, or being shamed for having a different experience of the world. Others keep quiet until someone who has found that place walks in and there is immediate connection and openness that allows the quiet to become a safe conversation. If you have found me, know that it is not an accident, but an opportunity. Know, also, that it is always well within your right to choose to pass this opportunity by, and move to something else. There are no wrong roads to take, only different paths.

Wherever you are on your path, I welcome the chance to share even a small part of it with you. There’s nothing that brings me more peace, than seeing the recognition in someone’s face when they realize they are connected to everyone and everything, and can perceive life from a higher perspective, I am seeing what I hold most dear- Truth.  I can be reached at if you’d like to schedule time with me.

As always- I wish you well on your journey

Battle of the Selves: Ego vs Soul- Mind vs Body

•July 13, 2017 • Leave a Comment

Just because we are aware of, and can identify different aspects of ourselves does not mean they are separate pieces that live a life of their own.  Everything is connected, and we can see differences in our aspects but that doesn’t make them different ‘selves,’ exactly.

For example, take a large quartz crystal and hold it in your hand.  You may notice different inclusions.  Just because one of them may be a black spec, doesn’t mean that the entire crystal is a dark spec!  It’s a part of it, and it isn’t separate! On the same token, a drop of ocean water, is NOT the entire ocean.

The mind isn’t separate from the body, but the body isn’t the mind and the mind isn’t the body.  It’s like saying Montana is the United States and vice versa.  The important thing is the expansion of our awareness to all of the aspects of ourselves without DIVIDING OURSELVES.

Emotions aren’t separate, inconvenient parts of ourselves.  They affect the Mind and the Body because they are part of them both.  Ego self is the human identity.  So my Ego is Nicole, but my entire Being is not just this one aspect.  Nor is my Soul separate from my body.  It animates my body and my body is a manifestation of the energy that is my Soul.

When we have a broken heart, it affects us physically, emotionally, mentally, and on a soul level.  No trauma or joy affects only one part of ourselves.  This is why it’s paramount to pay attention to each part of ourselves and look for the communication that goes largely unnoticed regarding the state of our entire Being.  Physical pain is never just about an isolated mechanical issue with the body any more than a tragic loss is only about our emotions.

When your body speaks, listen, and find the connections to the other aspects of yourself.  When your mind speaks, listen, and do the same.  Emotions are the bridge, so they are most important of all communication that you can receive from your Self.  Spirit is also a part of each of these aspects, and can never really be separated.

In all things, there is an opposing view, but never is there a division other than your own perception.  For example, I am as grateful to have no one I’m obligated to at the moment as I am lonely to have no one that I’m obligated to at the moment.  It’s all about how you look at things.  All of it affects all of me, and as a human I have the privilege to see and be aware of the different aspects of myself.  But never am I alone, separated, or divided within myself.  I am always whole, and no matter how long it takes, I will eventually see all of the pieces and then, like all Souls, I will return Home.

The Hidden Path

•June 29, 2017 • 1 Comment

It’s a funny thing when someone finds out I have ‘gifts.’ There are a lot of assumptions made about me, such as, I must ‘know’ things about them, or I’m somehow working with an unfair advantage in life. Once again, returning to my roots with this blog- it’s all about the ‘confession,’ right? So here it is.

We’re all born with natural strengths and weaknesses. I can’t explain why I am able to intuit things better than someone else is able to excel at playing basketball. When you have something that you naturally do well, it’s because you are meant to use it to your advantage. It wouldn’t serve anyone for an incredible athlete to spend his or her days as a tax attorney, would it? So why would it be any different with this ability? I have always been able to sense the unseen, and for a long time I denied it and forced myself to do things that made me miserable. Who did that serve? Was it better for me to sit at a desk, and collect a check rather than use my gift? The reasons why are always the same for all of us. We do it because we don’t want to be seen as ‘strange’ or because our families have certain expectations, or because we are scared that we can’t make our dreams our day job.

From the Gaia Oracle deck by Toni Carmine Salerno

At some point I had to come to the realization that my not using my gifts was the equivalent of a violin-player who represses their creativity in favor of being an accountant. It’s time that we, as a society, started to put some value on things that we currently don’t seem to give a flying shit about. The guitarist on the street corner who is really incredible at his craft is seen as less valuable to society than a medical doctor, for example. We’ve seen this sort of thing over and over in cheesy movies about the end of the world and who to send to the ‘new’ planet to start a fresh, new civilization. It’s time to stop letting others assign you a value, and to, instead, shine, sparkle and explode like the amazing talent you are.

Having said that, there are major challenges in living a life that is intertwined with the Divine. Your entire scope of reality is through a filter most people can’t fathom. There are struggles such as ‘how do I charge to heal someone when this is a gift? I mean, Jesus didn’t charge, did he?’ You may also notice the number of people in the ‘spiritual’ arts that are overweight, have health issues, or are always financially strapped. Truly spiritual people have a hard time living in this reality, which is why these issues are common with us. The inner knowing is so much more real than the physical world. The tendency is to split. We say, ‘this is my ego/physical world and over here is my spiritual/diving purpose world.’ In a reality where the truth is that we really are all connected and so is everything that is around us, this is just fucking absurd. Our capacity for understanding the truth is not great as humans, and it creates a need to compartmentalize things- both for our own management of the outer world and for the comfort of those around us who will not understand otherwise.

Hear me on this one- Your body isn’t your enemy or your vehicle.
Your Soul is bigger than your body.

Spiritual wisdom without the practical application of it is literally useless. We fight our intuition with our logic, for example, because we believe it to be more real, or perhaps dare I say, ‘smarter.’ Your decisions are yours to make, either way, but I’m here to break the bubble of those of you who think it’s all about one or the other. Being human is a divine experience because everything that is alive originates with the Source of everything and IS Divine. You may assign a value to a blade of grass versus a human being, but neither is greater or less than the other, because both are Spirit made Matter. Reason through it as you like, but the core of it is unchanging. Life is all about perspective, and if you need to check with someone else to prove you are right about something, you’re using your only your head. The deeper wisdom that never leaves you is always there, waiting to be accessed, because it’s always connected. The best advice you can ever get is to use all of what you have to move toward what you desire to become. If ‘God’ doesn’t make mistakes, then nothing you do is essentially wrong, unless you judge it as such. There is no outside force called the Devil. Energy has the ability to become anything. Some of it becomes what we call ‘evil,’ but at the core, it’s still energy. It’s still Source.
Matter isn’t separate from Spirit. Spirit isn’t separate from Matter. Embrace both, and you will know an entirely new life. If the Universe sought to give you the gift of song, then sing, and as you do, know that energy is dancing through you as your song, and you are releasing your energy back to the Universe to become something else. If you are gifted in Science, then create, and know that as you are creating, the energy that you put into your research is being released back to the Universe and has the potential to become the foundation for another’s creation. Everything becomes something else, because everything is energy, and energy does not die.

This is the Hiddent Path. Walk in the LIght of Spirit with One Foot in each World.


My Philosophy for 2017

•February 8, 2017 • Leave a Comment

Nearly all of the posts here are straight from Spirit, direct experiences I’ve had with Spirit or stories that I share because they inspire others. Today’s post comes from the VERY human part of me, that- just like you- trying to figure out my life, day by day, while listening to Spirit’s voice in the midst of the chaos around me. It is also meant to inspire others, but from a more grounded, earthly perspective, so please take it from where it’s coming from. The purpose of this blog has always been to share what it’s like to live from an intuitive viewpoint.  This is another installment in that spirit.

It’s 2017, and I’m nearing the 42 year mark of my life. In that time, I’ve been taught many things that haven’t been true, and definitely have not served me. I’ve learned that my soul has the heart of a child, and that is something that can invite in hurt because it seeks to help, shelter and comfort the hearts of others. I’ve learned that this is my makeup at the molecular level and it cannot be changed. My will has tried to steer it in many other directions, and each time, the compass still points to my true North, my true calling, my true soul’s purpose. If we are all here for a reason, then this is mine.

I’ve learned that hiding and being meek begets nothing useful. In spite of what some of you in my day to day life may think, I keep a lot to myself. I’m not perfect, and I make mistakes, but there’s a difference between calling someone out because they are being dishonest versus making someone feel bad because you don’t like their choices. This is the beginning of what I call the ‘no bullshit,’ phase of my life. Much like Judge Judy, I have a sixth sense for false statements, and I’m done accepting bullshit. If it smells like bullshit, and looks like bullshit.. it’s probably bullshit, right? I call it like I see it, and that means I may be seen as this awfully dirty-sounding word people use- ‘confrontational.’ Am I confrontational? Hell yes, I am! If something is wrong, I deal with it. I am NOT, however, antagonistic. Let’s not confuse the two. I like to solve problems, not cause them. I adore clarity, and knowing where I stand. In return, you will absolutely know where you stand.

I continue to honor and listen to the voice of my soul. At times it’s been my only friend. It’s never abandoned me, and when the world around me is swirling like a blender, I trust it. It’s never lead me astray.

So many of us have lived our lives for others. We behave how others think we should because it makes THEM feel more comfortable. This is true for most people who are sensitive, and/or empaths. It’s our nature to want to make others happy, and we truly don’t see our own needs going by the wayside. Our focus is on service to others, and this is something that many people don’t understand. They think there is an ulterior motive or agenda of some kind. While I cannot speak for all people, I think I can speak for the empaths out there who have been seen as much less than they are because of the lack of authenticity in ‘other’ people. When you hurt, we hurt. That’s what being an empath is all about. Being selfish, or creating stories just to get what we want, is appalling to us. It’s not in our makeup to do such things. Unfortunately, others do this, and it makes it very hard to be seen as real and authentic in our absolute need to care for others. I’m sorry for this, but it’s not going to change who I am, and I will continue to be the force I was created to be in this world, and I will continue to serve others. Others matter, and I know I matter too, which is why I also keep a modest set of boundaries to protect my very soft heart.

So, to sum up my philosophy:

– When I see bullshit, I call bullshit
– I care deeply for others and will continue to do so- but not at my own peril
– When I feel in my Spirit that it’s time to leave a place, I leave
– If I’m drawn to someone, I go with that, no matter what the cultural standard or social structure. Spirit cares not for such petty things when it comes to getting you a message.
– I will continue to give love, without expecting it to be returned in the way and from the ones I give it to, but knowing that in the end, it serves me to be able to do so because it fulfills my purpose.

Thanks for reading, and I hope I’ve inspired you to let your light shine! Do not let the lack of light shining from others cause you to dim yours! Shine even brighter and show them it’s not so scary.


We are here to love and support one another

Creation from Pain: Being Wholly Human

•January 10, 2017 • Leave a Comment

A lot of people see absolutely no reason for pain.  It hurts, and it’s uncomfortable.  What could be positive about that?  Seeing a loved one pass on, the ending of a marriage, or the loss of a friendship all conjure feelings on the ‘negative’ spectrum of emotion, and it would seem some of us carry those feelings with us throughout our lives. No one likes to feel shitty!  I get that!  But there’s more….

Nothing is created without something first being destroyed, and we are creators. 

Think of the pain of birthing a child into the world, or the way a seed must crack and be utterly destroyed for a plant to sprout from it.  In our pain lies hidden treasure if we allow ourselves to move through it.  

-From the Gaia Oracle Deck

Think of a song that touches your soul.  9 times out of 10, it’s a song that pulls on the strings of sadness rather than joy.  Why?  Why is it that pain seems to stay with us and happiness feels fleeting?  It’s not hard, actually.

We allow ourselves to feel happiness, and let it flow through us, but feelings like grief, loss, and pain stay with us because we refuse to give them the freedom to flow.  

There is freedom in tears.  There is so much relief when you give into pain and experience it as a sensation and not as something you are in complete resistance to.  All of our feelings are beautiful and human.  They are not rewards or punishments.  They are natural and they all must be allowed to flow in order for us to be wholly human. 

When your heart feels an ache, don’t fight it.  Welcome it.  Emotions become trapped in the body and eventually become physical pains and ailments.  Honor your journey here by not holding on to anything.  All is in process, constantly flowing and in motion.  In the words of Robert Frost, “Nothing gold can stay.”  

Letting the pain flow through you releases it, and opens you up to the language of the Universe.  See the hidden gift in what you may now see as an inconvenience, uncomfortable situation, or useless torture.  It holds a truth that is waiting for you to see it. 

Adventures in Spiritual Dating: Can you hear me now?

•January 8, 2017 • Leave a Comment

This one speaks directly to others who are spiritually-connected and living an intuitive life.

The absolute biggest issue I’ve encountered in any sort of dating is that of a lack of connection.  When a person, such as myself, has a strong connection to Spirit, everything else pales in comparison.  The intensity of the closeness I experience with loved ones in Spirit, animals, Angels, etc, can be compared to what I imagine it feels like in the womb.  Looking into the eyes of another person, versus looking into the eyes of a puppy, for example, is something the average person can understand when it comes to this comparison.  There is no hidden agenda, or manipulation.  It is the purest form of connection and it just feels like absolute communion, a joining of spirits.

Being empathic means that I often connect to someone and experience their current state and vibration, which generally acts as a shield to who they are on a deeper level.  It’s confusing because my intellect wants to chime in and do some logical interpretation of what’s being said,  but my intuitive mind is so open it’s difficult to do more than live in the moment.  In truth, I operate by living in the moment, staying present, and that often means that I don’t give much thought to ‘what’s next’ or ‘why certain things are discussed and others are not.’  I’m simply ‘being,’ and flowing with what is happening.  Unless I’m paired with someone who is also present in the moment, without an agenda or having his head be in another place, you can imagine the feeling of disconnect that I experience.

Feelings of being isolated are quite common among spiritually-connected people.  When you have had the experience of being so close to something, it becomes evident that in human form, we simply can’t touch the soul of someone who hasn’t reached that point of being spiritually-aware or connected.  It’s like trying to stack two different sized Legos and always having those notches that don’t meet up stick out in that annoying way.

This will be my last in the ‘Adventures in Spiritual Dating’ series.  I continue to reach out to those I am drawn to, and explore what adventures lie ahead.  A word of sage wisdom– Once in my life I had a very special connection with a boyfriend who could literally read my thoughts, and I his.  It’s never happened since, and that was about 20 years ago.  I was so young, I had no idea how special and rare that connection was, and I’ve never been able to fully break it.  We remain friends to this day.  So– cherish those around you who do not need words to be understood and who can communicate with a touch and a look in their eyes.  They are your vibrational match, and hard to find. Being on the same wavelength is far more difficult when you’re operating from the space of being spiritually aware.




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